FB post 16 Sept

Thank you all so much for the gifts, messages , letters ,calls and so on. Im feeling slight overwhelmed in the most squishy lovedup way! Over the comming months I will do my best to respond to you individually if energy levels allow. At the moment I am realising that having cancer is a bit of a full time job - my days are filled with appointments , form filling and phonecalls, mostly medical and benefits. Everyone I have engaged with so far has been helpfull and I feel guided by safe hands through the minefield of paperwork. Im hoping it settles a little once the treatment falls into some kind of rhythm. The next step is a PET scan to see where the cancer is active and give it a 'stage'. There are only 2 scanners in Scotland that can do this and I have a 5 hr drive to Aberdeen ! Luckily the NHS Scotland cover some of the costs , so I will stay in b&B. The following week I see the haematology team again to determine how the treatment will unfold. I will possibly start on steroids for a couple of weeks. Morale is high , partly because I have been signed off work and I have begun to realise that for years and years I have been juggling so many balls - its a great feeling to put one down and do some things that I love. Its only simple things ( cooking without being in a rush, pootling at home, reading books) but I am really finding joy in my day after years of joyless grind ! I am also really opening my heart to giving time to the deeper work and constellations continues to change my world on every level. I can actually feel it working at a bodily level, I know how to use it to support my pain and energy levels - awesome mind blown, heart wide open to this journey, all so timely and wonderful. Theres so much more to say and I will happily try and write in more detail if this sharing helps/interests you......or is it self indulgent blahdeblah ? Anyway Im loving being connected and reconnected to friends old and new.xxxx